I've chosen DARKNESS

ALONE
IN
THIS
DARKNESS

x FANGGER

Does this darkness have a name?

This cruelty, this hatred, how did it find us?

Did it steal into our lives or did we seek it out and embrace it?

What happened to us that we now send our children into the world

Like we send young men to war, hoping for their safe return

But knowing that some would be lost along the way.

When did we lose our way?

Consumed by the shadows. Swallowed whole by the darkness.

Does this darkness have a name?

Is it your name?

There comes a time when every life goes off course.

In this desperate moment who will you be?

Will you let down your defenses and find solace in someone unexpected?

Will you reach out?

Will you face your greatest fears bravely or move forward with faith?

Or will you succumb to the darkness in your soul?

Sometimes pain becomes such a huge part of your life

You expect it to always be there

For you can't remember a time in your life when it wasn't.

But then one day you feel something else

Something that feels wrong, only because it's so unfamiliar.

And in that moment you realize…

You're HAPPY.

Friday, April 20, 2007

today i had my tooth extracted!

hahaha i went to the dentist after school.

then the dentist was explaining to my mom how getting an implant was like hanging a portrait o_0.

first, you need to put in the screw x_x

then you have to get the portrait, hang it andden make sure it's straight and whatsoever.

damn lame lah haha.

and implants are 4000 BUCKS! my eyes were like O_O when he said that but my mum was still all smiling and like it didnt matter. bet she's just putting on a front xD inside actually heartpain until cannot take it haha. why so shallow?! kekex just kidding.

then the dentist put anaesthetic on my gums. wah the needle damn painful sia! he injected twice andden checked if it was strong enough but some areas still hurt when he moved it so i had another 2 more injections. gosh the torture. and one of them happened to be injected at the gum area where it hurts the most and i was wincing real badly. the dentist was all 'you are doing so well... such a brave girl' all that shit lah. so cliche man. it so doesnt make me feel better lol.

then when it's all numbed, he started moving my decayed tooth around and he started pulling real hard with the pliers thing and i could HEAR my tooth separating from gums man!

i got to keep my tooth for memory sake xD shant post the pic here cos it's really quite gross haha. and i am bo gei! the gap is still very uncomfortable (:

anyway after the dentist trip i went shopping with my mom with that stupid cotton bud stuck in that empty spot and it was just bleeding like crazy haha. and my mouth looked so swollen cos of the cotton ppl were just staring at me haha xD

the bleeding took a whole 2 hrs to stop! not stop, lessen. enough to eat my dinner haha.

i still feel weird with the gap there. it will only be fully implanted in 6 months time. gosh that's long...

and i feel so sad for that 4000 bucks! it's so NOT WORTH IT! i can so use that money and go on two overseas trip! dang it! my mom was joking that she was gonna take that money out from my japan trip and i almost died man. phew (: but i still feel so bad for wasting so much money.

i promise to take better care of my teeth from now on (not like this tooth's problems was my fault in the first place xD) but well, still (:

oooh and haven you realised how suddenly optimistic i am today? i swear it's cos of the excessive loss of blood man. but i end up swallowing alot of them back so hmm.. not much of a difference there haha. i know it's gross, too bad! xD

anyway i shall go sleep and try to regenerate much of the loss within my body. kekex byeee!

9:22 PM

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